My blogging friend George over at the Off Key Of Life does this exercise where he plays on the dark-side. The general idea is to get out of your comfort zone and write something different fiction-wise. It seems like a good idea so I’ve decided to give it a shot too. Why did I choose flirting with darkness? Because that’s what it feels like to me lol.
Ephemeral
Death appealed on so many levels. There was something vague about it that smelled of darkness, smoke and shade. Scary yet beckoned like sweet poison in the veins; a Moth and fire– that beautiful curious light and a heat that burned.
A frail form shifts in the bed. She wonders about it too, how she will die. Maybe a woman worn out by the affairs of the world. No, boring. Of sickness perhaps, the kind that turns the skin grey and leaves a hollow in the cheek. Predictable. Or maybe this new sickness hasn’t been discovered yet.
And there’s murder. Someone could kill her with a knife. Multiple stabs… twenty-six? That’s so Ripper. She chuckles. Or use a chain saw to hack her in bits. Legs first because no one wants a victim running for help. They could peel her lower lip or even flail her skin– that was bound to hurt at least. Perhaps her cries will ricochet through the hollow walls of the abandoned bunker she’s held.
A sound filtered through her consciousness. Squeak. Squeak. She pulls her blanket higher up her shoulders.
Were witches real, supernatural creatures—Vampires, Werewolves. The building was high enough and her squint vision was bound to throw off any compelling vampire gaze if perchance they fly. One could fly as a Bat, she forgets his name. Still, the slow drain of blood as life seeped out of her body. Would it hurt? Would she feel her soul ready to take flight to another plane, maybe linger in this world as the rest of her is devoured by nature’s anomaly?
Squeak. Squeak. The sound drew closer.
Her toes curl underneath the blanket. Cold toes. Fifteen years old feet wrapped in thick woolen socks to keep them warm. There is another squeak from the door. She wishes she hadn’t requested the lights be turned off completely, yet she found comfort in the darkness.
The squeak sounds so close now. There’s heavy breathing next to her. She swallows.
Lucy. Her name is the caress of soft wind in her ears.
Lucy are you awake?
Slowly the air escapes her lungs. It’s Kat the girl next room who never did learn the art of silence. She’d let her have the socks to cushion her landing after convincing her to ditch the stupid flip-flops.
Yes. Are the nurses gone?
Let’s go.
They make their way up the stairs to the top of the ten storied building housing the hospital.
Dracula, that’s his name. Count Dracula.
Perhaps she’d fly instead…
Wow. This is some kind of writing here! Quite scary actually….I don’t know if I want you to do more! 🙂
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Lol. Honestly I don’t know if I want to do more either 😀
Perhaps something more suitable to your palate? http://pathsonwater.com/2015/06/12/a-long-way-home/
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I agree with George. Great stuff that has the potential to veer off in different directions! I love that “horror” feel. ☺
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Thanks Marquesssa 🙂
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It’s a beautiful story and your flirting with darkness produced great rewards. I have a friend who writes horror fiction and for the life of me I don’t understand how he can stand it.
Like George said, sometimes your readers can see things in your work that you didn’t even have in mind when you wrote the story, I’ve had that happen to me several times on my fiction blog and it’s usually thrilling to see how we can see the same thing and get different meanings.
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Thank you Ada.
What’s your fiction blog address?
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Hey there my sister! I don’t only like your name, but wow, you can write. I am from Liberia and It’s refreshing to see you represent Nigeria. Well, you’re gifted, I hope you know it. Take care.
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So nice of you to come by. Thank you for your kind words and I look forward to reading more from you.
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Now what’s a sweet girl like you doing with a tale like this? Looks like we have a new horror writer on WPress, ladies and gents.
I could tell you enjoyed yourself. 😉
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Lol I did enjoy myself
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Uju darling, I think you can start churning them horror stories
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You’re too kind darling 🙂
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Seems like you have a budding career as horror writer…:) I really enjoy stories that leave much to the imagination and can be taken in a number of different directions. This is one of them, for sure. Nicely done. So now that you had a taste of the dark side, are you willing to continue your flirtation with it?…:)
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Oh my, thanks. I’ve never been a fan of Stephen Kings because he scares me pants down, but yes yes yes I am definitely going to keep up with this. Thanks for coming up with this awesome idea 😀
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Good for you. I look forward to more darkness..:)
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You know how to write….. artistic with words. I recommend in this case of fiction you brood over something real for a while before you start typing….. cut a part of something that could happen… like the way you did that story of the bike accident (non fiction). Put yourself in a real life situation like someone who is accousted by armed men and he or she is dumped in the trunk of his/her car and is uncertain of their motives and uncertain of destination and is being driven around town. Such a story for example would hold the audience. Because in this one I must admit i couldnt read through to the end even though i would have loved to but i didn’t understand what the character was experiencing or was it just random thoughts.
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Hi Sammi. Like I said earlier, the whole idea behind the exercise is to get out of the comfort zone. Writing in the first-person is almost second nature to me. Writing in the third-person isn’t lol.
Still I’ll explore some of your suggestions in subsequent posts 🙂
Anyway the story is about the random thoughts of a 15yrs old concerning death.
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Shhhhh….don’t tell anyone what the story is about. Let them imagine what it might be….:) My thoughts were very different and if you read the story again, even though you wrote it, you might see other directions you can go with it. It has strong potential.
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Hehe I’m so giddy with excitement 😛 Erm *lip sealed*. You’re right, I just read it again and I can imagine a different direction for this. Hmm…
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Lol…glad you’re happy.
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